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Wednesday, May 30, 2007

hmm.. this blogskin has been with my for v v long. and hahas. i like it. and i don't have time. thus i dun see me changing it any time soon.


but hmm.. abyss of solitude. it's becoming a fact. but mayb all along it was lik tat, jus tat nowadays the fact is more prominient.

anw. i kept my promise to myself! i finally picked up new books to read! from the library. there was charmed and everything was fiction. =) there was one book (the swam kingdom) that was the rewritten version of the fairytale about this princess who has to knit nettle shirts to save her brothers who were all turned into swams. there was this book abou the twelve princesses who sneaked out at night to dance (sounds familiar? =)). and also, my favourite were christopher pike's "alosha" and "the shaktra". IT"S SO NICE! as usual his books ROCK. i simply love his plot (which include a very weird idea on this time travel test). ahh.. reading fantasy makes me sooo happy. =)


o i discovered that the 10pm show is v nice! =) thanks to intro from zihui too. but i can't stand waiting everyday to watch it. i wish i could jus borrow the whole series and watch it. supernatural too. it's reali sian to wait and wait for the next episode. blah. pirates and the curse of the black pearl now. DAMN NICE! i feel lik watching it again (and waste time). i jus like it! =)



signing off
amethyst
4:24 PM




Thursday, May 24, 2007

life is so complex. bleah a quick one (i hope). i'm feeling rather... inspired to blog.

life is so complex. and it was only jus now on the bus i'm thinkin i hav a dull and boring life. but mayb again, life is all made simpler for me because i look at things differently, in a simple manner. i think i jus found out sth about myself (been finding out loads of things about myself, and sad to say, it's more of the bad things about myself tat i am quite sure of them). i found out that i cannot really "sense" things about people. sure i may think/brood a lot, and project alot into the future such that i fancy myself as a "melancholy" (melancholy is one of the personality type. the other types being chloleric, phlegmatic and sanguine. now which one wil u be?? i noe some of my frens who are true phlegmatic and some who are choleric. try googlin for these words and take some quizzes on it? be sure to tel me wat's ur personality type if u reali bothered to google for it.), but in the end, i think it all boils down to the fact that i'm rather self-centred. bleah. all i care is how i feel, and i plan and do lots of speculating in the future to prevent myself from being hated. i can't sense wat other people are reali feeling. it's lik i'm so... naive/stupid/innocent/blind. i can't even judge a person properly.

right now, studies is the priority of my life (wat a boring life). but i get so bored/not accomplished for my studies that i think about ridiculous stuff tat shouldn have brain cells wasted on. is that y i'm not doing as well as i should (lik i even hav the potential to do very well)? that i'm distraughted by this kind of stuff, even thou it will appear i'm totally focused. so i should stop these musings and concentrate instead on y is this rxm first order and wat the hell is a bacteriaphage.

hmm.. having no cca makes me feel lik i have a lot of time such tat i even allow myself time to come online and blog..

mayb my english is not THAT bad. but it's not THAT good either. i shall erm. read this holiday. tchers hav been saying we should allow ourselves time to rest and not overwork (fine, i was planning to do nth but study this whole june, not allowing myself to rest since i figure out i'm a very unproductive person who somehow manages to slack even thou i planned not to), so i shall allow myself to read a book. and mind u, the book in question is tat of FICTION (delicious fantasy that will allow me to escape the grim realities of life) and not horrid argumentative crap tat i wont understand.)

wen to watch pirates of carribean, at world's end today. not bad! but kinda long. and i'm kinda unhappy that i dun understand the very fast british english they spoke (and the chinese subtitles were flashed equally fast), but the way they made sarcastic remarks were funny, especially johnny depp! =) reali felt so satisfied and happy during and after the movie. =)



signing off
amethyst
8:04 PM




Sunday, May 20, 2007

yesterday was my harmonica concert. resonance 9 (i think, oops. =P). and despite the fact that our performance wasn't excellent, we managed to pull thru. well, i can say this based on the fact that my sis and bro actually enjoyed the performance (hehe).

SPECIAL THANKS to jane who agreed to help me despite the very last min plea for help. it's GREAT knowing that i actually have someone i can turn to in times of CRISIS. so our section three song may not be the best song, but it's a special feeling to actually perform with jane, who is of different school, different cca. wat are the chances of that? hahas.

of course, i must thank those who came to my concert too! thanks for the support for both this year and last!
pri school frens: yiling, yam wen, suyi, choun eng (next is going to be jane's concert! and this time, it will be my turn to relax and enjoy the music! =))
sec school frens: cher, kit yeng, andrew, simin (reali great to c u al again. we shall see each other again for hc's harmoc concert!)
jc frens: atikah (and fren) and sihan (thanks for coming!!! =) reali glad u came despite the fact that harmoc has a sianz reputation in vj... ) and minsi ar minsi.. too bad u couldn't make it. but at least u bought the ticket! =)
thank you all so much!!! =)

hmm.. thruout the concert. felt nervous and that everything was soo rush and messy. there were lik so many ppl and blaah.. reali nerve wrecking. i'm kinda glad that it's over!! (IT"S REALI OVER!) but then somehow, there is still this faint tinge of regret (of wat? i'm not reali sure) that somehow always hangs around despite the fact that i can't wait for cca to be over (it was the same with npcc last time too, jus tat this regret feeling didn't last as long as it did now). hmm..

reali felt that the performance wasn't reali going too well (especially since i (horrors of horrors) forgot the last part to java jive (a song i've been playin for duno how many thousand times), and felt VERY sian and that i jus wana go home and sleep. but when the shalala and boom boom boom song came, it was actually quite NICE! i think it's most probably the songs la (wise choice of songs indeed!), but at least i enjoyed playing those two songs. hahas.. i could happily sway to the music and look pro (mayb i am pro cause i played em' correctly, as far as i noe! =))

when it al ends, i felt RELIEVE beyond words and can't wait to get home. so tired man. and that was reali stupid. cause i stupidly left my bag in school and went home. -.- had to go back to retrieve my bag. -.- very stupid and unglam way of ending the nite. hahas. not tat i specially did anything to end it with a bang anw. but reali.

blah. i think my entries are getting very boring. =( and i dun lik this. because i can't stand borin blogs myself. if it's reali getting boring, i think i should stop bloggin. the reasons my entries get boring? i think i'm getting too cautious about wat to say, wat to write. i duno if i should jus write wat i feel. i can't reali jus write wat i feel because i'm scared i'l incur someone's wrath unknowingly. blah. and my english's falling apart too. according to my gp tcher, my use of language is non-idiomatic. not sth good i tel u..



signing off
amethyst
6:14 PM




Thursday, May 10, 2007

been getting subtle messages (from Fate hmmm...) tat perhaps i REALLY shouldnt jus look at the dark side of things. i shal look at some of the happy bright side!

i'm thankful for my family. =) i have a dad, a mum, a sis and a brO! my dad who doesn't complain despite having to ferry us three kids to and fro, my mum who despite being sick stil carry on with the hsework, my sis who nv fails to remind me of the realistic view of life (HAHAS) and of course my bro who's always slacking around and not studying despite it being the midyrs now. hmm.

i am glad that i have frens, whether they are of the ahps group, or nhss grp or vjc grp on my msn list. hahas so now u noe how's my msn list arranged. -.- hmm haven been doing much to keeep up with these frenships (jus the very fact my sms is lik non-exploding but actually 100+ extra??) but sighs. am i reali too busy? but reali. chem test tmr (WAT AM I DOING HERE?)

ok. so much for the happy things. happy things get boring sometimes.. so another day another entry perhaps.



signing off
amethyst
8:03 PM




Wednesday, May 02, 2007

hmm.. seldom do i get such relatively free time. shal blog den. hahas

been wondering. i feel lik right now, other den my schoolwork, i hav nth else in my life. that's damn pathetic. my whole life practically revolves around schoolwork schooolwork and cca. nothing else. i wonder wat i'l do with my time when a lvl ends. i wonder wat i'l do with my life when my a lvl results sucks, because results and study is al i have now.

depressing.

i forgot wat's it's like to confide in someone. these days, it's al kept within me. after al, wat's the use? i would wan ppl to empathise with me, and perhaps to find me a solution, but we are all in different schools now, facin different complex situations, so pray tel me, wat's the point? i don't reali want to complain and sound whiny (thou most of the time i think that's how things end up lik so long ago) but watever. been thiinking about this since i-noe-when.

ok, mayb free time isn't so good after al. waste my time on such stupid thoughts. but reali, who noes mayb these kind of thoughts might jus help me with my analysis and evaluation we are all expected to in these days whether it's for gp or econs. blah.



signing off
amethyst
7:53 PM